Regroovable by Ville Lehtovaara

Features, Music

It had been raining all morning. I woke to the uncomfortably pleasant guitar chords emitting from my mobile phone on the nightstand. The bodiless guitarist was replaced by my friend’s voice. Ni wanted to meet at the bar from last night. When we met, the rain was forgotten for the sun, which formed an eloquent rainbow overhead.

Ni

What was the music that played during Reading Rainbow? You know the theme song? I think it was the same band that played at Ethan’s bar mitzva. Come to think of it, they played at his wedding too! But the strangest thing happened – When the priest said, “I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may now kiss the br- ” this band stood up and said “Get a room you heathens!” Then they proceeded to pass out psilocybin mushrooms among the patrons.

When Ni talked it was like the tip of an iceberg, floating on an aimless ocean. The brilliance of her ideas was found during the invigorating sleep between the drunken party and the wretched hangover. Like when you’ve worked through the week and you finally have your day off, but then your boss calls you back in.

Wo

Get to the point, I’m so hungover and my head is killing me.

Ni

Okay… Did you listen to the album?

Wo

Which album?

Ni

Regroovable.

Wo

Yeah…it has no unified style, so it made my brain jump from chasm to chasm, and after the jump I just said to myself – “…that’s it? That’s why I jumped?”

Ni

It seemed so perilous, but it was just a joke. I see what you did with the chasm metaphor – because of the gratuitous use of reverb?

Wo

Exactly. At one point – “Tango De La Muerte” I was convinced that this was an amazing album from a flowering jam band… Then my body dropped back to into the chasm.

Ni

Only to be ear fondled by a man seeking out a crawfish at a bar. It’s alright to be into the same sex but when your next song talks about your sister teaching you how to read using the bible, it just drops the listener down another chasm.

Wo

It’s all too clear that this band was formed in their youth Sunday School. They are all talented, but they don’t belong in the same room. “My life is misery; my life is pain” is on the same album as a sing-along for children.

Ni

I don’t know which drove me crazier – the solo drop at almost the exact same timecode for every song or the extraneous metronome sounds which plagued the timbre of the legitimate instruments.

Wo

Yeah, I really wished they had stuck with the sound on track 7. It’s the only one that will stay on my phone, for the bike to work in the morning.

We heard thunder in the near distance.

Ni

Well I guess that’s our cue to part ways.

Wo

Meet again at the next rainbow?

Ni

Oh, very funny, just because I am wearing green and carrying a gold bag?

Wo

Hahahaha

Ni

Kiss my ass, loser.

And then we parted ways just as the rain returned.

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